¿Cómo se dice “holy shit”?
Flirting with Magic
“mmmI’m not a weirdo.”
Was it a good day?
“Those aren’t women” from Modern Hobo Code
Brant Charles's Commencement Speech To MIT
I’m Brant Charles, and 14 years ago I was just like you. Now I’m a meta-physicist.
Being a meta-physicist is awesome and it isn’t even hard. Newton discovered gravity whilst lounging under a tree. Einstein came up with most of his theories by daydreaming. Stephen Hawking just sits in a chair all day.
And the stuff we do is fun, too. Galileo? Dropping the feather and the cannonball? Shit, man - I could do that stuff all day. And we get to play the coolest pranks. That Hadron Collider thing? Not even real. You would not believe how awesome it feels to make everyone on the entire planet shit themselves because they think you’re building a black hole machine.
Guess what? We have time machines. And they’re better than you’d believe by about 50 better-points, which are a unit of measurement we haven’t even told you about. Just yesterday? I played virtual reality ping-pong on Jupiter. You guys think it’s cool to go to the moon? Wait until you visit an alien culture whose customary greeting to guests is to give them a basket of gold coins and a jetpack.
I’m meant to teach you guys some kind of life-lesson before I go. Screw that. I’m gonna teach you the life-lesson. As in the meaning of it. Be careful. This is dangerous territory. Your head might explode or your face might melt or I don’t know I’m not some stupid biologist, okay? So there are these things called string- no. Too late. I can see the blood dripping out of your ears. Well, no big deal. There’s an asteroid headed this way in a couple of years and we’re kind of don’t have any tickets left for the shuttle outta here. They all went to the super-models, if you know what I’m saying.
Well, good luck in your new liquified-brain, doomed-Earth lives. Oh, and one last note? This entire speech is a palindrome.
New Mobile-Device Purchase Makes Asshole More Versatile
“It’s amazing—I can make quicker phone calls, send more e-mails, and surf the web faster than ever, without being tied down to the office,” said the prick, who feels “disconnected from the world” if he does not have access to corporate communications for more than four minutes at any time throughout the day or night.
I never understood this particular platitude… and for those of you who don’t know what a platitude is, it’s a platypus with an attitude. —Michael Ian Black, “College”
Gigolo Tony (via RETRO aka the Flickr photo set that everyone on the web gets everything that’s awesome)
Thelonious Monk (via RETRO aka the Flickr photo set that everyone on the web gets everything that’s awesome)
I would say this is soooo 80’s, but for all I know this is some sort of MIA/Sia/Santogold protege and this picture was taken yesterday in SoBro.
