It is “truly a golden opportunity” to be able to buy a 24 karat gold-plated DeLorean on your American Express card from a magazine.
Short Order Cook | Marathon,TX | 2-Person Household | She can bench press over 300lbs.
Um, you forgot to mention the part about the snake in your freezer.
Wait, scratch that, I think I see bagels. Snake bagels! (Snagels?)
Andy Kaufman in Heartbeeps
Gizmodo - First TV Image of Mars Ever Was Made With Crayons
The people at the JPL were so excited to receive the images that they couldn’t wait for them to be processed by the lab’s imager. As the first picture was beamed down as a stream of 8-bit numbers—each point indicating a brightness point—they thought of a quick way to get an image straight away: Print the numbers indicating brightness in paper strips, put them together, and color them with pastel crayons.
last.fm dashboard coincidence: Do something funny with your right hand!
The Rules of Snap Club
1. We do not talk about snap club. We sing about it.
2. WE DO NOT TAK ABOUT SNAP CLUB. Feel free to harmonize.
3. If someone says stop or goes limp, we do not pirouette-kickball-change over their head.
4. Only eight guys may snap at eight guys at a time. However, if four guys encounter one guy writing his gang ensignia in chalk on a wall, those four guys may snap at the guy with the chalk because, man, have you ever tried to get chalk off of concrete? Then you can round up your guys and you all can lay on top of him an pretend like you kill him. Feel free to snap while doing so.
5. Only one snap-off at a time. If another snap-off is taking place, feel free to jump or spin over top of other opponents while waiting.
6. Only people from the Sharks/Jets may snap. Keep toes pointed and hands jazzy.
7. Snapping will go on as long as it has to; sometimes exceedingly, painfully long.
8. If this is your first night snapping, you HAVE to snap. Please keep the rhythm.
The unified cutlery theory will never work because the electroweak interactions of knorks will never allow the elementary particles of a spife to fuse with it. Trust me, I took 3 years of utensil physics.
Police Slog Through 40,000 Insipid Party Pics To Find Cause Of Dorm Fire
“You see the cigarette falling here as the male witness in the foreground flexes, and then here as the male witness lifts up his shirt to show his new falcon tattoo.”
Factoid: Astronaut John Grunsfeld has a specially fitted spacesuit with an enormous astro-codpiece. He also requires in his contract that he be carried to repairs by a giant golden clamp holding on to said astro-codpiece.
